What Would Freud Say?

"American stamps, [Professor Dr von Igelfeld] had observed, always showed people doing things, whereas German stamps were designed not to excite people too much and were somehow more appropriate."

~ Alexander McCall Smith, The Finer Points of Sausage Dogs

Engagements, babies, breakups... was I living in a completely different world this summer? My mouth dropped when I heard all the "news" that had been going on in the past 4 months. Oh, right, I was supposed to be paying attention to the class: Mel and Ryan in the middle of Dinwoodie, setting the teaching bar high for their Newcomer Is. I showed up too to catch some pointers, and maybe settle down some of the butterflies. Took many notes the night before in TA Class, but they only looked like blotches and scribbles in the daylight. They named their team "D2" after someone *ahem* brillant made the suggestion. (Must brainstorm a cool name for our team...)

Woke up this morning unsettled. In my dream I was trying to teach a dance class in my kitchen. The room stretched and warped to fit over 10 people... and I could feel the dreaded microphone headset heavy on my head. I think we were doing Jive.

Agh, sorethroat... can't seem to stop anxiety eating... ack! *deep breath* Here goes nothing.

"Is that a tattoo?!" I imagine my mom's eyes bulging out cartoon-like, but I'm only half paying attention, devoting my energy to moving the flowers, balloon, books... etc. into the house. What a surprising weekend.

While taking me home from Friday Feast, Chris fills my head with "Nine Million Bicycles". I don't think I dreamed of them, but feel so worn out that I wonder what had been playing through my head. Thought about skipping technique class... but I go. Practice rumba, samba, and my barbering (hacking) skills... and then head over to Lidia's. The deal: I peel the apples; We bake. By the end of the night I had earned "Apple-peeling machine" status with 2 apple crisps (mushes), and an apple pie cooling on the tile counter. It was all so relaxing. Unless you were watching Lidia. She moved like a whirlwind, all at once making pie dough, peeling potatoes, frying fish for dinner, and talking on my cell to a rep at Shaw about getting her phone fixed - a blur! She prepares Yerba Mate for me and I sleep well (though it might not be related).

Wake up the next morning to a sky blue and clear for the HIV Edmonton Walk for Life. At City Hall, I am "Tattoo Girl" *cue theme music*. Armed with a water spray bottle, fueled on Cookies by George, with the special powers of being there. Offered to put one on a gentleman who was sitting on the steps waiting like me. Felt tiny when he said, "No, thank you. I already have one." and showed me his inner forearm. In simple black and red: HIV+

Ask myself over and over again: What am I doing here? They didn't need another photographer. There were cameras left, right, and centre. I was getting gear envy. I'm short. I'm not good at climbing things. And I have shaky hands... I have no business in taking action shots. But all that didn't stop me from taking lots of pictures anyway. Sat in rapture listening to the Japanese drummers in the opening ceremonies. Started talking to "The Balloon Guy". And the plans for the rest of the day flew out the window.

Eventually made it to Anne's Housewarming Tea with "Balloon-Guy-Florist-First-born-Metrosexual-Overachiever" Chris in tow, and a crazy story from the Roost (or more accurately from the parking lot of). Anne graciously greets us - thankyou for "party karma". Her place looks great! People laugh as I'm a bit "dim" at putting the lamp together. We listen to Tom Waits and Leonard Cohen, entertain the theory that the Queen is a lizard (and something about Free Masons?), and drink tea and disguised tea-looking substances. There were still lots of goodies from Anne's efforts (tea sandwiches, scones and blueberries... yum). Had to laugh at the "How to Tea" book from...? Good thing Anne didn't buy flowers - as the book suggested, the ladies might have fainted :D Did anyone notice there was Queen Anne china in the collection? With most of the dishes washed, the food finished, and minimal furniture broken, it was time to go. A trip to Sherwood park turned out to be very fruitful - or flowerful...

What a weekend.

A Very Merry Un-Birthday

"That would be the ballastic model of trust." ~ Malcolm

Chocolate cupcakes, hairclips, stickers, hula grass skirt, very delicious Friday Feast including green garlic and salsa, new wash gloves, glass charms by Stephanie, candy jewlery, sunshine, chicky socks, bubbles, sunsets, Rem's tea ceremony, and the game "Pit". A Very Merry Un-Birthday indeed :) Thankyou.

"Listen to your heart, but pay particular attention to your liver, because your heart is a little unreliable sometimes, but your liver will never lie to you. Also, your spleen is pretty trustworthy. But when your kidneys start talking to you, it's time to quit drinking."

~ Better, Deeper, More Advanced Inspiration Quote from The Dog Ate My Resume by Zack and Larry Arnstein.

The CBC radio says it's Day 10 of rainy weather. I'm dragging my feet to work, but other people are making the best of it. Imagine finding him (left) perched on top of the watertank in the women's bathroom. *smile* Cute isn't he? Others have been redeveloping a filing system with gusto. To each their own.

Lidia broke her tooth again - the second time this month... ah so hard to resist the lure of caramels... "Sometimes I think if I was really grown up..." Thankfully my encounters with caramels haven't been so bad.

Went to the dentist Wednesday and glad to report that the wiggly tooth is not falling out. And no cavities either! Other signs of falling apart are being attributed to patellar tendinitis. Drugs have been prescribed, and soon I'll be dancing with... well... minimal complaining.

Rem tried "reminding me" about rational and irrational numbers. And Celina tried to trick me with a few French phrases. Really peoples, I didn't think I needed to know this stuff after high school.

Anyway, should head back to work. *sigh* Almost there!

Oh, almost forgot the other big news! An interesting twist of events: I am no longer TAing at St. Basil’s for the Newcomer II and Pre-Bronze class. Instead, I’ll be teaching at Dinwoodie for Newcomer I! Anxious about it all, but excited too. Next week classes start!

The End is Near

"Only time can heal your broken heart. Just as only time can heal his broken arms and legs." ~ Miss Piggy

So excited! The End is near! The final book of A Series of Unfortunate Events is finally coming - to be released on Friday, October 13th. Yay!

Now for more puzzled moments: Guerlain has launched their new scent - and now you too can smell like Insolence... I think I must have missed something here... does one really want to smell rude or offensive? Or is this a one up on Dior's "Addict" line, and Poison? Strange stuffs.

It's been another fun weekend, including a private lesson with Delphine where Darren I recevied a new routine for quickstep. The dreaded heel-turn shows up twice... what we were doing wasn't "the weirdest thing" she's seen... but we have a lot to work on... such as the new "thumbs-up" hand hold that is all the rage ;)

Rushed home after the lesson to get glammed up for Malcolm's Flaming Friday! Celebrations for the Master of Chaos included drinks on fire (mixed and lit by Treena), liberal sprinkling of rose petals, Remkes on the piano, beautiful people dressed up in versions of their finest (complimented with thick socks!) And roaring renditions of "What do we do with a Drunken Mathie?", "Scarborough Fair", and an alternate version of "Happy Birthday". And one cannot forget the cake: moist chocolate cake with stawberries, white chocolate, and (removable) cream... yum... Hm... wonder if he understood the ruler? Congratulations and thank you again, Malcolm!

Had to head home early despite interesting debates, and more singing, because the next day was technique class at Tango's. Delphine told us this time we were making little tornados, and she wanted to see BIG tornados. (Ironic (?) since it was tornado weather than stopped D&D from going to a Worlds competition in Ukraine this past summer.) And that we want to look insane... Um... o.k. At least it's not Dominic talking about his magic hands :P

Headed over to the Stanley Milner Library and met up with Chris, Liz, and Nader to catch "Splice of Life" presented by AP!RG. The musical was about GMOs and featured a swarm of killer bees, a Terminator plant who sang falsetto, biopirates armed with cotton swabs to "take samples" of the audience for "Activist Genes", and many more. Even Dolly and clones made an appearance - though I was a little disppointed that they were the billed "tap-dancing sheep".

After much indecision, had lunch and went over to Nader's for some cathartic cleaning. Chris allocated me to the kitchen... I hope that wasn't some sort of commentary :P

Sunday was dreary, but at least I got to enjoy it with Catherine. Though she rolled her eyes, I think she was excited as I was about the Accordian Extravaganza coming this weekend... or then again, maybe not. Not that I can attend, it's going to busy with the EPL Fall book Sale and HIV Edmonton's Walk for Life (care to sponsor me?). And some time during the weekend - I might make a pie!

Yikes - have to head home for Dad's second birthday of the year. Lunar calendars... fun...

Catherine and Charlotte - get well soon!

Catching Up

"... It came from aliens, and only infects tall people..."

~ Ted, with an example of a "red flag" response to
"What do you know about HIV/AIDS?"

Raining blustery day. But I'm in high spirits! May be due to the sugar, or the knowledge that it's only hours away from the weekend?

Michael's moved to a nice office with windows. Not so easy for him to just yell across the hall for an request. But he did send me a "warm fuzzy" by email. I'm a sucker for praise. At least that means I'm doing some part of my job well.

Sometimes, it really is the little things that can make a difference. This kept me smiling for the LRT ride: A mathematician was carrying a ruler, a protractor, and a calculator in his carry-on and was arrested by airport security. His crime? Carrying Weapons of Math Instruction. *laugh, laugh, snort* That was one cool LRT driver.

Blogger has finally fixed what ever it was that was not working with photos... but still not letting me add them to old posts (dang!). So here's a "collage" of photos I promised:


Leva Girls (the girls adorable)


Cheryl (the girl adorable)

Anne Hosts Friday Feast

Proof that Lana cooked something edible


Happy Weekend! Stay warm!

(ir)Rational Fears of the Week

“You shouldn’t use four letter words like that!” ~ Tamin, on the forecast of snow

Nikki told me last week that dreams where your teeth fall out are "classic" dreams about fear of getting old. Hmph. Yeah well... I am. I signed up someone for dance classes, and they were born in 1988! I mean... is that even legal? (*Pause for simple math in head*) *Gasp!* It is! My eye sight is already going, and I have all these aches and pains from dance. Is dancing still a good idea? Am getting almost daily calls from Angela warning me about the consequences of not taking care of myself. Maybe the dream is really just about me falling apart... incidently, there is a tooth that feels kind of wiggly...

Not very productive today either, but did answer a questionaire on perceptions and reactions to a pandemic in Edmonton. "Which of the following do you believe can help prevent a pandemic?" One of the choices: Sauerkraut.

Lots of movement of people in the last little while. Just received two emails one from old Circle Kers. Lindsay T is currently in Sri Lanka (!), and Alto is in Calgary with plan of heading out to Australia in 4 months.

Tabs on other people: Malcolm has passed his defense (Congratulations!) and probably drinking as I write :) Jaclyn has survived her first University Tuesday, and aptly makes the observation: It was just like a Thursday. Christiana's been exploring more of Ottawa, and encountered this animal. She's puzzled, I'm puzzed. Any guesses? I'm pretty sure it's not a squeaver, or a squirvel...

Headache... looks like rain... time for some diet Coke and Mentos therapy. Or going home to sleep.

What to do

There is something wrong with trying to speed read through a book of meditation and relaxation, isn't there?
The work day was dragging. Have a song stuck in my head that's both beautiful and sad, and completely infuriating! Distracted between the music in my head, wanting to dance to it (possibly Viennese), and then cringing from all the muscle pains from last night's first TA class of the year. It was tough. All these happy excited firstyears there, and I was dead tired from work. But the good news is after the first hour, body parts started getting numb and the endorphins kicked in! Yay! I didn't even flinch too much when Dominic said, "GIRL! What are you doing? You're dead!" That, by the way, was in referrence to my hips.

Tired, tired, tired. It has been another busy stretch that's been very quotable! Just need to remember the quotes...

"It's Moxie Frugal!" ~ Malcolm

First up was Friday Feast. It was an intimate (small) affair, where Rem cooked and served Thai food. After talking about gambling schemes, football, contributing to the betterment of society, and some grammar, Steph and Malcolm introduced me to "darmok". Wikipedia shows this as an episode of Star Trek the Next Generation. Their explanation to me involved metaphoric language, or the allusions within a subculture. I just wanted to make the blog more interesting... so any references to toast, green tea... and um... reading will actually mean *nudge, nudge, wink, wink* :P

Headed out with Chris to pick up Liz to visit the Ivory Lounge. In which on the way there, we start discussing who would win in a "Most Screwed Up" contest. I didn't plead my case too much. Didn't stay long. Certainly thought piano bars would have a different image.

"I have magic hands. " ~ Dominic

Technique class at Tango's, UADC dance registration, and then to the Math Department picnic. I wasn't the only odd one there, but I'm starting to think I should have some cover story for being around... Dave says he's a Master's Emeritus... Rem told us to watch out for squeavers (squirrel and beaver crosses - frightening).

"Ah, the blend of 3 colognes... the smell of desperation." ~ Clarence

Then onward to the Maria's birthday dinner at Matahari! Lots of picture taking, lots of good food, wacky conversation some too racy to involve here, there was quite a bit of reading of the menu and drinking green tea. Headed over to Brad's for cake and Family Guy. And finally home to sleep.

Relaxed on Sunday. Listened to the rain, and then heading over the Catherine's to hang out. We watched Miami Ink, which is where people go for tatoos and therapy (they say it's real). Now, if I only didn't have to donate blood...

Catherine: It's hard to figure stuff like that out, I mean, he only died hundreds of years ago.
Jaclyn: And they wore really tight pants.

- On the death of Christopher Marlow... because it's all related *laugh*

Hopped on HK Pop

“It’s about people with OCD.” ~ Jeff on Amelie... what?!

Simply love short work weeks. Brain is virtually fried right now from not getting enough sleep, but I only have one more day to go before the weekend!

Returned home late on Monday night after subjecting Matt to close to 2 hours of HK pop music. What a good sport! He survived with minimal ear bleeding, and I got to sample some of my new musical purchases. Though it was slightly embarassing - he's a musician, and I was playing for him some of the sappiest pop music in the world. Good thing there were a couple of Wong Faye selections that were um... a little better.

Spent most of the rest of the work week listening to the remaining CDs while trying to concentrate. Not working so well. I'm in a sappy mood, the sun is shining outside, and there's so much activity at the U. Rem says there are too many people in the way. But I want to be out there @ WOW ("Geeks Unite") gaping at all the students, following the footprints on the ground (whomever they are modelled after has a huge gait, high arches, and is bow-legged), and scamming a daytimer (Catherine says I should just take one by force - those first years are small).

In other news: Ben has passed his defence, and is now Master Ben! Conga-Rats for Ha-Master Ben! Malcolm has finished his thesis... and probably that bottle of scotch. Both Anne and Christiana are settling in... and I have a Method named after me! And all this time I only had a building. Exciting :) Oh, and Dad has taken over the bike :( Well, at least it's getting used. One day, Lana, one day.

Had a good chat with Darren and though he has not revealed to me how my badly mailed postcard from Melfort (first wrong mailbox... then wrong address?) made it to him - we did get some paperwork done. We're going to Wild Rose Ball! Yes, another trip to Calgary. Told you this was a year for travel ;)

Ah, time to get back to work. Only a day more until Friday Feast, yay!

From Amelie:
Narrator: Nino is late. Amelie can only see two explanations. 1 - he didn't get the photo. 2 - before he could assemble it, a gang of bank robbers took him hostage. The cops gave chase. They got away... but he caused a crash. When he came to, he'd lost his memory. An ex-con picked him up, mistook him for a fugitive, and shipped him to Istanbul. There he met some Afghan raiders who took him to steal some Russian warheads. But their truck hit a mine in Tajikistan. He survived, took to the hills, and became a Mujaheddin. Amelie refuses to get upset for a guy who'll eat borscht all his life in a hat like a tea cozy.

Calgary: Ray & Grace

"Sometimes we need to educate our parents." ~ Uncle Ray

Finally, a little bit of downtime. J&J have been keeping me busy with not exactly wholesome activities. Jeff said he wanted me to think of Calgary as being a place of fun - where I'm free! Well, it's sort of working. He took me downtown several times while running errands, and I'm finally starting to appreciate how beautiful it is.

Woke up yesterday morning to a quiet house. Ah, the silence. They were sleeping in, and I got to lurk around and investigate. The pantry and fridge were stereotypical bachelor. At first glace there were only marshamallows, peanut butter, and rice crispies, with no milk (so, rice crispies squares anyone?). There were rolls of film in the freezer... After some more searching, I managed to whip up some toast and tea for breakfast, and was slightly thankful that Mom had put another stash of fruit into my bag. There was a shimmer and glint in the old room I used to stay in - Jeff has taken over the space for his collection of antique cameras. And the whole place looked a lot better (i.e. cleaner) than the last time I visited.

Eventually Jeff woke up, pulled me away from my book, and we started running errands. Went to Chinatown to pick up some of Uncle Ray's favourite pastries. Stopped at Farmer's Market for some fruit. And then to Uncle Ray and Auntie Grace's...

First impression: They've lost a lot of weight. I don't remember what I said. My mouth was probably open in half shock... seeing something so different from what I remember, but also better than what I expected. The two of them ushered us in, and Uncle Ray and Jeff started talking about cameras.

Uncle Ray and Auntie Grace are brother and sister. I first met them when I was visiting sister Angela in Calgary in 1994 (or so estimated). I'm not sure how they came to be friends with Angela, but they've been part of the family since then. Maybe even closer - since our family is... slightly odd. Uncle Ray would take us out to flea markets, teach us how to shoot cameras, and firearms... Auntie Grace would play the flute with me, and said that if I moved to Calgary she would teach me piano and stain glass work. Both would give us advice. Uncle Ray and I would write letters to each other, but I haven't seen either of them in almost 3 years. A lot has happened since then.

Auntie Grace officially retired from her teaching days for drawing / art, and piano, and on this visit showed me some of her works from way back - back when Marilyn Monroe, Ingrid Bergman, and James Dean were on the silverscreen. She had sketched these old screen stars for fun, and they looked amazing. Turns out she illustrated a children's riddle book too. Uncle Ray brought out his fireworks slides. We talked, watched some Iron Chef. All in all a great night. They're still the same... loving, caring - though I felt a bit awkward. Uncle Ray then started answering the questions I couldn't ask: It's been over 18 months since he found out he had cancer. He's on his second treatment of chemotherapy. No one knows how things will go, but at least the side affects haven't been that bad. He has good days and bad days, and today was a good day. He also offered some suggestions for me and my parents. Ah, good ol' Uncle Ray advice.

Anyway, with my main mission of visiting them accomplished, the rest of the rest of the weekend in Calgary was just icing. I yielded 30 cents at the casino (one of the not so wholesome activities alluded to above), having found it on the ground... and the slot machines not accepting my money. And I got a good dose of Chinese / Hong Kong culture (food, music, trying to speak and understand Mandarin). And had a picnic with J&J's other aunts, and grandmother at Bowness Park.

Matt will be picking me up soon to head back home. Can hardly wait.

Made it!

"You're not allowed to ride? What kind of f*%#$@ Walk is this?"

~ Matt, on the HIV Edmonton Walk for Life

I made it! I'm here in Calgary and I'm on a computer. Note the time. Didn't think I would be up this late and blogging. Internet access... *drool*

The trip down was uneventful, and seemed to go by really fast. We talked, we laughed... I answered frantic phone calls from Mom and Dad (we were running late)... and at some point fell asleep. Arrived in Calgary before 11 p.m. and stopped by Matt's sister's place. Colourful. She fed us cookies, and we ranted about Nelly Furtado. Remember the whole scandal about the magazine cover... and then now? O.k. maybe we're the only ones who paid attention. Anyway, J&J picked me up and took me to a sushi bar. Eating at this hour... yikes. All the way J&J complained about how long we took: "He drives like a granny" Which he didn't. I had another narcoleptic episode when they started to talk about cars... Got another call, this time from Angela: Don't go to bed too late, don't drink... Why can't I get cool calls like Matt? His brother called him to ask a physics question. Addendum: No tax questions!

Really impressed that Jeff is learning Mandarin from a friend (I can't even bring myself to take a class). The friend gives him homework - complete with sentence composition. He showed me some works: Ne ze dow wo jia dung ne ma? *laugh* My brain is sooo sleepy.

O.k. I'm getting kicked off by Jack. More tomorrow.

Before heading out

From television and movies I’ve learned that the dramatic act of shortening ones hair usually signifies emotional change / upheaval, giving up the past, and can have huge ramifications on career (i.e. Felicity). In real life though, you get some compliments, you get some raised eyebrows, and life goes on. The motivations might be the same - or could be due to your miscommunication with (or saving a couple of dollars on) the hairdresser. Anyway, I have again, a new 'do!

It has been another eventful. Pablo is leaving! He has accepted a position with Northlands, and will be gone by next week. He gave me a granola bar as a thank you gift, and told me I needed to read Proverbs 3.

Anne has been moving in to her new place. I offered my services on Tuesday, and got to ride in Mabel, and read the manual while listening to some of Will's country music. I couldn't stop smiling, moving is exciting - new beginnings! - and the music was the right degree of cheesiness. Her new place is a single bedroom apartment with hardwood and laminate floors, and very white walls. So much space. I can imagine it being "home". Can't wait to see it all decorated :) My suggestion of polka dot walls to match with her red and white striped beach chair, however, was not met with approval. :D An added boon of the move: I now have a bicycle! (Thank you, Anne! Thank you, Steph!) The bicycle (yet to be named) is pink, and it fits. I can tell already that it's a happy bike: Anne says it looks like a basket can fit on the front.

In other news, Chrisitiana has made it safely to Ottawa and is settling in. She has been updating her blog fairly frequently, and it sounds like she's going to start exploring the city soon.

Spent most of the night (over-) packing, and should head out for more preparation stuff. Then, onward to Calgary!